TRANSCRIPT
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The Rabbi Daniel Lapin Podcast
Episode: Using The Reality Test to Choose Best Path
Date: 02/09/24 Length: 51:26
Daniel Lapin 0:00
Greetings, happy warriors, and welcome to the Rabbi Daniel Lapin show where I, your rabbi reveal how the world really works. Thanks for being part of the show. And thank you for all you do to help promote the show. And if you have not yet subscribed, please do that as quickly as possible. And if you can encourage others who liked the show to subscribe, well, please do that as well, that is good for us and good for you. So we speak about how the world really works, right. And one of the most compelling ways to discredit a doctrine is to show that it has no relationship with reality. It's just not how the world really works. And one of those, for instance, is the doctrine of equality. Now, it is fairly well known that in the early 17th century, when the Pilgrims arrived in New England, the first couple of years, they nearly starved people did die. And one of the things is that they had adopted the principle of equality, what they did is that they had one big community farm, and the produce of the farm was shared equally. Well, the farm performed so poorly, that by the time it was divided up among all the pilgrim families, there was literally not enough to sustain life. And so the next year, they were literally saved by a decision to allocate to each man, a section of the land. And so each man had his own homestead, his own area. And out of that, all of a sudden, the productivity of the land, multiplied by many times. So, you know, it's very simple, we understand that in the real world, people care more about their own possessions and their own property than they do about anybody else's. And instead of bewailing that, and instead of utopian thinking, that says, well, let's work and change people on this, the first thing to do is to change circumstances and make them adopt to reality.
Daniel Lapin 2:57
Another example of this keeps on cropping up. You know, perfectly well, that if you are instructing your 17-year-old daughter, who's going out into the world for the first time, and she's going to get her first job, and she's going to be thinking of moving into her own place, which she'll share with a few other girls. There are certain things that you as a parent would want to tell her. One of the things you might say to her is that do not, under any circumstances, go to isolated places with a guy. If a guy invites you back to his apartment or his house, don't do it. If a guy invites you to his hotel room, you don't go and people hearing you might say, why are you doing that? You're blaming the woman? It's nothing to do with her, the man has to behave properly. Yeah, you're exactly right. But the reality is that until some dreamed-of utopian time arrives, men, they're all going to be cad-ish men, they're going to be scoundrels, they're going to be rogues. They're going to be bad men. They're just all and so your primary concern is protecting your daughter. She's 17 years old. She's coming out into the world for the first time. The things you have to tell her to protect yourself. You might even tell her how to dress. You might say don't don't dress, you know you're going to work down dress provocatively. It'll, make men concentrate on your body and not on your soul. You don't want to do that at the stage of your life, or at any stage. And people hearing you will say He shouldn't be able to dress any way she likes. Men have to stop being pigs. Yeah, right. But we're talking about reality. And that is how the world really works.
Daniel Lapin 5:15
So equality is like it would be nice if everybody in among the pilgrims would have worked just as hard on the Community Farm, as they did on their own farms. But that's not how reality works. And so we understand that that's one critique, we could level at the idea of socialism. Equality is a doctrine that doesn't work, freedom does work. Trouble is that freedom results in inequality. And an attempt to impose equality to impose equality wipes out any possibility of freedom. So you got to choose, do you want freedom? Or do you want equality? If you choose equality, it conflicts with reality. And if you choose freedom, well, then you have to be mature enough to understand that equality is not part of the deal. How is about the doctrine of feminism? Well, one only has to ask, does it conform to reality? Or does it conflict with reality? I'm not altogether sure of what the doctrine of feminism is. I'm not sure anybody does. Because it's feminism is a social construct to use one of the popular phrases of the left. It's not like, you know, what is the doctrine of gravity? Well, it's not a doctrine, it's just a reality. Gravity is a force that causes two masses to attract themselves to one another, in proportion to the size of their masses, and in inverse proportion to the square of the distance between them. It's not a matter of opinion. Gravity just is, feminism is not like that. Feminism is a matter of opinion. And there are any number of social and cultural and political components and theories and moral philosophies having to do with gender and rights. And these, you know, there are some women who are feminists in one way, but not another, there are some men who are feminists in one way or another. And so it's very difficult to know exactly what it is. But basically, it's a movement that wants to see an end to sexism. Well, okay. And I'm quoting from one of the authorities, so I would never say and then sexism because sexism isn't defined in any way whatsoever. Now, we have to say, what's, what is sexism? And, you know, okay, well, let's try and do it without using the words that feminism strive for. They want to see social justice, for those who have been oppressed by the patriarchy on how we got to figure out what the patriarchy means. And, and so on and so forth, it becomes extremely difficult, but if sexism lies at the heart of it, which is essentially how I mean, I think sexism means noticing a difference between men and women, this now becomes very difficult because all of the all hope for the future of mankind depends obviously on noticing a difference on men noticing that women are different and women noticing that men are different. And without that, it's extremely unlikely that we shall see the human race continue. Yeah, nonsensical. But the how well, okay, well, they should have exactly the same amount of money. Well,
Daniel Lapin 9:36
see here, you run into a problem. Because, let's say for the moment that marriage is one of the most important aspects of male-female relationships. Well, actually, marriage works best when there is not financial parity. That's right. So much. So Is that the stay-at-home dad, the idea of the husband staying home while the wife is out working, is one of the highest and most reliable indicators of divorce. It doesn't work. And it so it happens that the reverse is true that the greater and by the way, all of this is presuming that the husband is a gentleman that the husband is a man that husband is a nobleman that the Husband Husband is not a tyrant or a scoundrel, or everything I'm saying is on the presumption that the man is a man. And, and I know that there are fewer and fewer of those around. And I know that wonderful women sometimes feel almost hopeless about the diminishing number of real men to be found. But at any rate, if if feminism is about men and women having exactly you see the problem we come into, because in, in reality, women are happiest when they are with a man who makes more money than they do. And a man is happiest when he is bringing in the bulk of the money. And that his wife's comfort, and survival and ability does depend on him. For men that is a wonderful thing, men like that. A smart thing for a guy who's getting married to a girl or a woman who's working. One of the smartest things you could advise your male friends, young friends getting married, one of the smartest things they could say to the woman to whom they're getting married is listen, we're not going to buy a house or get an apartment that is dependent on both of our incomes, I'd like us to be able to live on my income alone. And your income should go into a savings account for the future, whatever it's going to be, but not that we are going to get ourselves into a spending situation, which absolutely depends on us being a two-income family. That's not a great idea. So it's a smart thing and, and the majority of women, and when I say the majority of women, women who have not been fatally damaged by the culture, the majority of normal, healthy women will respond very positively to that. They would love to be in a marriage, where the financial security of the family does not depend on them working. Most women would love that. So they're right from the start. There is a conflict between reality and feminism. Because reality is that most women want to I'm just gonna say women want to get married. And men, if they are mature and wise and are real men also know that they want to get married for a number of reasons. And we cover this very extensively in our new book, The holistic view, which is that so much that brings joy and achievement into a man's life happens because of his wife. Two straightforward examples. A man has a relationship with his son because of his wife. That's, that is pretty basic and pretty real. All right, every man would like to have a son. And, and a, you know, any, any male, any person of the male persuasion? Who says, Well, I don't really care about having a son, you are probably in all likelihood, a fairly damaged male. That's a very different situation. From the there are many couples or men who are incapable for various medical reasons or whatever. They're not capable of having children. I get it. That's a tragedy and it's very hard. And people deal with it in better or worse ways. But ordinarily, in the natural order of things, men, want sons now you might say, well, all you need is a compliant consenting woman and you can have a son, right? That's all compliance and consent. Nine months later, you got a 50% probability of having a sale. All right. But that's the mistake. Nine months later, you have a 50% probability of a male fetus or of a male child. But that's a very different thing from a son, isn't it? A son is a unique relationship, a relationship between a man and his son. It's very unique. And it is extremely difficult verging on the improbable for a man to have a good relationship with a son, if he doesn't have a good wife, because that relationship between a man and his son comes about because his wife makes it happen. Very hard for it to happen otherwise, impossible, very, very hard. Now, there's several reasons for that. One of them is that the way the good Lord created us, there is a natural and comfortable relationship between a man--a boy and his mom, and a girl and her dad. That's the way we are. And so it's a reason you know, you'll, you'll find that many men have a tattoo with a heart and the word mom, right? Men love their mothers, but a relationship with the Father. It's very, it can be awkward. And I mean, there's no man who hasn't felt it. And that's why Sigmund Freud came up with the most unbelievable nonsense, complete and utter Bilgewater theories about the relationship between a boy and his mother and a boy in his father, complete and utter rubbish. But the reason he was driven in that direction to try and find something to explain, is because every man has experienced a certain basic awkwardness with his dad, at a certain point, now when he gets older, it comes right usually. But the relationship depends to such a great extent, on the role of his mom, she can really build the connection between a boy and his father says that the man ends up with a real relationship with his son. And conversely, girls have a natural, easy relationship with their dads. He is, after all, the first man in their life. And they, they look to Him for security. And they look to Him for support and sustenance and strength, and the wherewithal of life. And, and this is why I mean, you know, everybody knows, it's an old truism that, you know, girls look for guys, girls who grew up with great fathers look for guys like fathers like their fathers. And sometimes fathers have to help with that. Because by the time a girl is 18, or 19, or 22, and she's looking for a husband, somebody to spend the rest of her life together with in partnership. At that point, her dad is already a very accomplished and developed man. And there is absolutely no way a 25-year-old guy can be that. And so it takes a lot of wise guidance on the part of a father to explain to his daughter and help walk her through this. And to say, look, here's this guy is no good for you for the following reasons. And this guy, this guy could be good if you like him, I have no problems, because he's got good character. And he's got great potential, and he's on the right track. And he's using his time wisely. But she had well, he's not this and he's not that young. He won't be for a number of years, because it takes a while. But a wise father has the role of spotting the potential in his daughter's future mate.
Daniel Lapin 19:12
So all of that happens, because of the connection between a father and his daughter and her daughter and her dad. It's so important that we know and this was very disturbing, when the psychologists and the doctors began to first research this, but there's a lot of literature on this. And that is that girls who grow up without fathers in the home, reach puberty significantly earlier than girls who grow up in intact wholesome families. What do you think of that? Isn't that wild? And by the way, if there is if the mother has a boyfriend In the house, that makes it even more. But this is a very striking thing. And it's it's troublesome to the world of science because it's hard for them to find a materialistic or a scientific explanation for why it is that girls who grow up without a father in the house hit puberty significantly earlier than other girls. And the answer obviously, is it's a spiritual issue. It's not a physical issue. And without a relationship with her father, she is already seeking a man in her life. That's exactly what women do. They seek out men. And, and this young girl, she might be very young. But her need for a man in her life is satisfied by her father, when there's no father around, she still has the need for a man in the light in her life. And her spiritual need, brings along a physical manifestation, which is the arrival of puberty, because she, she now has to find a man whose there is no father. So she's got to find another man. How does she do that by being a woman so she becomes a woman as early as she possibly can? Right? This never This is healthy stuff. But all part of the way the good Lord created us and and that's why it works.
Daniel Lapin 19:31
The problem is that there are people who either don't know how the world really works, or they are determined to combat this, and to somehow force the world into their vision of what they think the world actually ought to look like. Yeah, every woman needs a man. And every man needs a woman, what does a man need a woman for? You might say, well, he's got physical needs. Now. That's, that's obvious. But let's go much deeper than that. A man needs a woman for one thing in order to be socially connected with his community. And, and that's a reality. You know, many men listening to me right now might be tempted to say to themselves, that's not true. I don't need a woman I, I've got friends, I'm connected to my community, you may think you are. But the truth is, you don't have any idea of what connection to your community will look like. When you do have a woman. And men without a woman feel that very poignantly, your connection with the community comes about because of the wonderful thing called a woman. Women connect more comfortably and naturally than men. And so all of a sudden, you're married. And you find that all of a sudden, there are new people in your life. I can't tell you, when I explained this at a speech or at a seminar or an event, I can't tell you how many men come up to me to validate what I've just said and say, yeah, some of my most successful business relationships have come about with men who are the husbands of women my wife became friendly with and then we became friendly with as couples. And we started off going out for dinner, or whatever it was, and then little by little, yeah, that's right. Your social circle expands exponentially if you have a good woman in your life. So that's one thing now that spreads from that very quickly to finance, not just friendships, but finance, in the way I just described. So yes, it's not an accident. You know, IBM in the old days, up until the 60s, IBM for senior executive positions, and IBM was not in any way unique in this was very common among large corporations. They would interview the wife, as well as interview that has been after there were several interviews with a potential candidate for a senior executive position. They would meet the wife as well because they understood how absolutely crucially important a good wife is in the role of a husband. In other words, the if you're not allowed to ask today are you but if you're hiring a man in your company, if you can hire a man who's in a great marriage, you get much more bang for the buck. That man delivers far more to your organization than a single man possibly can. Now, I know what many people are gonna, well, a single man can be married to his job. That may be true, but I'm speaking about senior executive positions, where the wholeness of the man counts how good his relationships are with other people. Because don't forget, when you are bringing a board, a senior person into your organization, it's not just technical skills you want, but it's his connections. It's his experience. It's how he relates to other people, both in the organization and outside the organization. And all of these things are far more successful in a man who is married than in a man who is single. So that's what a, that that's just a few of the things for which a man needs a woman.
Daniel Lapin 26:01
But why does a woman need a man? After all, if you are a good feminist, then you've already heard the expression that many women need men like fish need bicycles. You already know, women do not need a man for anything anymore today. Okay, so let me just explain something here that your feminist friends should really take to heart they should really understand this. And that is you can't you really need to think about how unusual it is. For people living in this brief, historic moment, living in a modern civilized democracy. Think about that. A woman doesn't need a man. Yeah, because if she is in trouble, she can dial 911 And the police will come and save her and rescuer or better yet, she's living in a society where the likelihood of ever needing to deal nine one is close to zero. As I'm sure you know, up until the 1960s, women could walk safely in the day or the night, in any park, in any city in the United States of America. It was very rare, very unusual for anything to go wrong. But there's been a change in the last 60 years a huge trend, a huge change. And now, i That's why I said dial 911. But I said it tongue in cheek because you all know as well as I do. The likelihood of a woman being saved from an assault by dialing 911 The odds are very low of anybody coming in anywhere near quick enough time to save her. But
Daniel Lapin 28:07
at least unit think about how things seemed in the 1950s, where for the most part, women were pretty much safe. But don't forget, most women were married back in the 50s. And so it's not just a case of taking out the trash, and fixing a leaking faucet and taking care of maintenance and gassing up of the car. It's understanding that the luxury of a woman making the foolish statement and even more foolishly believing the foolish statement that women don't need men anymore. That can only be set by a very comfortable, very affluent woman living in an affluent, liberal democratic civilized society. But for the overwhelming majority of human history, it's not been that way. And there's very little likelihood of not going back to that. You got to think if you if you take all the human beings who've lived in the last 2000 years, all the human beings who have lived on the planet in the last 2000 years. How what percentage of them do you think lived out their lives in peace without experiencing any life changing violence? Think about that. It's been estimated that only about 2% of human beings of all the humans who have lived in the last 2000 years only less than 2% actually did not experience life changing violence in their lives. Think about this, what proportion of Americans live their lives today without experiencing violence? Much more than 2%? Right. But I think you'll agree that the number has been dropping dramatically since 1960. At the time of Jesus, the Roman Empire was engaged in a long dreadful Civil War, and eventually ended up with the dissolution of the Roman Empire. That Civil War period, 3 million people were killed. Now, back then the world what was the world population at the time of Jesus, at 200 to 300 million, let's say 300 million might have been a bit less. So 3 million killed by Roman Civil Wars, would be the equivalent of a war today that would snuff out the lives of 70 million people. How many people altogether total, died in World War Two? Nobody knows the exact figure. Obviously, nobody has a clue what the exact figure is. But estimates are between 25 to 50 million people. Right, probably closer to 50. So even World War Two, didn't wipe out as many people proportional to the population as the Roman Civil War wiped out 2000 years ago. Think about that. By the way, during exactly the same period, the Romans were engaged in wars with the Jews of Judea in Israel. And they killed about 3 million Jews in addition there, which was a huge majority of almost all the, of all the Jews in the world, right? There were no Jews in in. In South America, there were no Jews in North America. The Jews of the world were injured there, and 3 million of them were massacred by the Romans. When the Christian armies of Spain and Portugal, decided to reconquer the Iberian Peninsula from the Muslims, there was in the period from about 1200 to about 1500 7 million people died. How about the Mongols? How many Europeans did the Mongols killed in their various invasions of Eastern Europe? So again, roundabout, the 14th century 30 million Europeans, and we're talking about much smaller populations than today. So in other words, the likelihood of being untouched by violence and by horror and by tragedy, was very, very low. Everybody was think about the 100 Years War. The 100 Years War was taking place around about the middle of the 15th century, while Johann Gutenberg was inventing the printing press, the 100 Years War, 3 million Western Europeans died. The Spanish conquests in South America, Colombia, Mexico, or the 16th century 15 million people died. During the same time, there were Protestant and Catholic wars going on in Europe. And that took the lives of 3 million Frenchmen. At exactly the same time, there were dynastic wars going on in China 20 million deaths. The 30 Years war going on with the Asad, Austro Hungarian empire and the Spanish and the Germans, same time was the 30 year war, how many, 8 million deaths there. Think about these numbers? To put them into perspective. If if you wanted if you needed to bury 10 million people in a cemetery you're packing them in plots, shall we say? You know, eight feet by three feet. How much land would be needed to bury 10 million people? And I've been talking about 10s of 10s Millions during do I actually I actually figured this out. Saving you Ruth partake but it wasn't hard to figure out. If you want to bury 10 million dead people would Take about, oh, 20 square miles. That's like bigger than any cemetery, you can imagine 20 square miles, that's an area of five miles by four miles. Imagine a square five miles long and four miles wide. That's huge. And now just fill that with bodies. And you've buried 10 million bodies. I mean that these are big numbers, lots and lots and lots of people dying. So, so to live in a time like today, where many, many, many Americans and many people in Europe live out their lives without ever encountering life changing violence. It's a huge blessing. But I think you'll agree that the numbers are diminishing. In other words, it's getting worse. More and more people are now witnessing or experiencing or seeing an end even witnessed to you. I mean, you know how upsetting it is, for a civilized human being, to witness brutal violence right in front of their eyes. It's life changing. And more and more people in Western civilization are experiencing that because Western civilization is sadly in decline. And you'll remember that World War One was touted as the war to end all wars. And after World War One, we got the League of Nations and no more wars are gonna happen. Well, it was barely 20 years before we got to September, the first 1939 and World War Two began. So I don't think anybody today believes that mankind is moving towards a state of civilized tranquility. Francis Fukuyama has a story and sociologist who, who wrote a book called The End of History, and there's there was a period where this was a popular idea that somehow we're moving towards the perfection of mankind. And we're really we're coming to a time where fewer and fewer people are going to die at the hands of brutality and violence. Anyway, I don't think anybody believes that any more people would like to. And it's true that when you are living in a relatively peaceful and prosperous Western civilization country, it's it's hard to realize that daily brutality and violence is is really more the rule than the exception.
Daniel Lapin 37:54
I can't help thinking of October the seventh of 2023. There in the south of Israel, peace loving citizens, people who'd gone out of their way to welcome Arabs from Gaza to come and work and become part of their communities. There were people, some of the people who died used to drive Gazans to Israeli hospitals, if they needed medical treatment. I mean, these people really believed they were bringing in a new era of peace. And they were hurled into the shocking realization that brutality and violence are normal. They're not ideal. They're not desirable. But they're, they are normal. And all of a sudden trying to show you that for a woman to say she doesn't need a man is mean, it's incredibly short sighted and uneducated and ignorant. Because well, let's just say the kibbutz members, and their wives and their children on October the seventh, they didn't even have time to understand that the only way they would survive that terrible day would be by killing every single one of the 3000 Invaders. But, you know, they didn't do it, and they paid with their lives. But, gosh, how about some of the women who survived the music festival? They were with guys who dragged them off, and in some cases, lay down on top of them, covered them with their bodies and the guys got killed and the bullets was prevented from killing the girls. Yeah, sorry, ladies. But women do need men. And if in this brief, shining moment of his Tree, you can get away for a period of thinking that between your job and the security firm patrolling your neighborhood, you actually don't need men. Lot's of luck with that. It's it's a temporary idea. It's a temporary dream, and simply not part of reality. Yes, a woman does need a man. And a man does need a woman. And the partnership they form that we think of as a family is by far and away the best arrangement for a child to grow up in. So much so that there has been talk of labeling the family as a an earned privilege. I have actually seen apologies on the part of people saying, well, you know, I have to apologize for my privilege. Excuse me, what pretty? Well, you know, I grew up in an intact loving family with a mother and father who cared for me and helped put me on the road. Yes, that's normal. That's not a privilege. Well, I suppose it isn't. But it's certainly a blessing. But it's, it's it's something that makes a huge difference in somebody's life. As I said, Neither girls nor boys do well, growing up with a single mom. It just doesn't happen that way. Girls and boys need a father and a mother. And mothers need a husband. And fathers need a wife. This is so basic and so real. But you see that does conflict with other ideas, such as sexism, we must fight sexism, we must fight the patriarchy. Excuse me. Again, I'm not even going to begin to puzzle of what the patriarchy could possibly mean. I mean, incredible what what does it mean? But assuming that there are various interpretations that can be placed upon it, it hatred of the patriarchy for many people would disqualify a normal family. Because the truth is I said earlier, both women and men would rather the man be the dominant partner in the marriage. Again, I feel the necessity to issue the caveat that this is provided. The man is a real man. He's a nobleman. He's not a scoundrel. He's a knight, not a knave. He is a gentleman. If he's not all bets are off. Obviously, everything changes. And yeah, I mean, obviously, no wise woman will willingly and knowingly marry a scoundrel, a cat and a knave. But in a situation of good men, and good women? Yeah, absolutely. They would both, they both do better when the dominant partner is the man. And if you want to prove for that, well, one of the proofs is something that I described in our book, the holistic view, which is that it is true that on average, men are taller than women. It is true that the mean height for men is about five, nine in the United States of America. For women, it's about five for that a five inch difference. But everybody knows that there are six foot tall women. And everybody knows that they're five foot four short guys they are. But if we were to take all the stats, and you know that we know a great deal about heights, because every single time you go to the doctor, you get your height measured and gets recorded. And so for people wanting to do statistical research, it's very easy to find out how tall people are in America. So if we took 300 million Americans and match them up into 150 million couples, just using complete randomness, because women on average are shorter than men. What percentage of couples would have the man taller than the woman? You'd think a majority and you'd be right about 67% About 67% of random formed couples would have the man taller than the woman. However, using your eyes as you move around society, and you look at people, what do you think is the real number? What is the real number? In other words, what do you think the real proportion is of couples in which the man is taller than the woman? And the answer is just about 90%. So therefore, since randomness would produce less than 70%, but reality is about 90%, there are only three possibilities, and that is women prefer taller men, tall men prefer shorter women, and or both, those are the only possibilities. There is nothing else to say about it. Yes, both men and women prefer the man to be taller than the women than the woman that says something. Remember, I've spoken in the past previous shows about how spiritual realities are revealed by physical realities, that the good Lord created us in accordance with a spiritual format. And so our physical reality matches our spiritual reality. There it is, I've just said it. Women prefer to be with a man that they can look up to. Now, I will tell you that I know plenty couples, where the woman is either the same height as the man or slightly taller. But in every case, I know every case I can think of the man is dominant by personality, by attribute by courage, by strength, by determination by financial wealth. Yeah, that's fine. It doesn't have to be looked up to physically. That's one thing. But it's also looking up spiritually. Right. And that is, I mean, it's a reality in in the most conventional and ordinary form of physical intimacy, the woman looks up at the man. Again, that's just a reality of how the world really works.
Daniel Lapin 47:23
So back to the idea that any doctrine that conflicts with reality is false. But it doesn't it doesn't work throng, simply. And so we've got to be careful not to buy into these ideas. Well, these days this so that told them were living in modern times, they will this saw, no, there are certain things that are built in to human beings. The right they're not going to change now, you can distort yourself. You can you can harm yourself physically, you can harm yourself spiritually, there's no question about it. But you do not end up living successfully. When that happens. There was a child raising doctrine a few years ago, and I still run into people today who believe in it, which is that it's not good to say no to children, for very, you know, they came up with various explanations and logical trains. Explain, it's not good to say no to a child, a child shouldn't be suppressed, or repressed, you should always try and let the child do whatever the child wants to do. Okay, well, what happens then is that you raise a child with no self discipline, and no impulse control. One of the great gifts that parents give their children very early on, is the power of self control, impulse control. Well, if there's one thing that can be identified as perhaps the most, one of the most important attributes, in terms of success in life, it's impulse control, meaning you don't act on your impulse, the first thing you feel like doing impulse control means you don't punch somebody or slap somebody or hit somebody. If they irritate you. That takes impulse control. Not everybody has it. If you were raised by loving parents who really cared about you, they said no to you enough time says you are able to develop the internal system of self regulation and impulse control. But the doctrine of choosing to raise children according to this doctrine have never say no to a child. It's a false doctrine because it conflicts with reality. It doesn't conform with reality. And so reality remains a wonderful bedrock barometer. of truth, because, well, reality just doesn't really lie. And that's why I always like reminding you that my job is revealing how the world really works. And one of the ways the world really works, is that what you need in your life, I don't care, whatever the circumstances and it may be, it may be hard given your circumstances to actually have this but you still should know that what you need are your five F's, you need not only to have your five F's you need to feel growth and progress in your five s, you need to know that you are improving in your family life. You're improving in your financial life. You're improving in your social life with your friendships, you're improving, physically, you're taking better care of yourself, and you are also improving in your faith and spiritual life. So until next week, my dear happy warriors, thinking of you always and looking forward to getting to know more and more of you as you go to Rabbi Daniel lapin.com. And you become a happy warrior. Until next week, I am your rabbi. God bless.
